A couple months back during a solo Pipe ceremony, I asked the universe to show me a concrete sign of what the spirit animals that move through the world with me are.
** Note I said “spirit animals” and not the one that is my fylgia, which is the power animal or totem that is always with you, all your life. More on that one in a bit! **
I’ve reached a point in my life where I want to be sure of things and make sure I get this walk right.
It’s too easy to get lost in your head and convince yourself of this or that being the truth or fact.
The next day, I was out running a delivery route for Amazon (something I do in conjunction with my freelance photography).
Rolled up on one delivery location and saw a giant osprey painted on the side of a building.
Painted on the side of another building was a giant great-horned owl.
I’ve often felt connections with both and have looked to both for guidance.
This was like being hit in the face with … “You asked for a concrete answer … How is this?”
It left little doubt.
Then when I arrived at a college to photograph a football game, saw a friend in the parking lot and went over to say hello.
He reached into his truck and gave me an Osprey feather … no knowledge of my connections with this bird, only that he thought I would enjoy the gift.
Little doubt became no doubt.
Flash-forward a few weeks, I thought to myself … “If the coyote is a spirit guide for me, why have I never encountered a living one in the wild?”
And wouldn’t you know it? … Inside of a day, I was traveling down the interstate with my family when a Coyote stood beside the road … front paws on the guardrail with his body raised up and chest puffed out.
These things humbled me, reinforcing the power of Spirit.
It did not need to answer my questions but chose to do so for which I’m grateful.
Now, I originally wrote this post a couple of weeks ago, but last night there was a new development as there were still certain things rolling around in my sense of self that left some unsurity with just how the Osprey, Owl and Coyote fit into my life.
Toss in that I’d been learning more on my Fylgia and wasn’t quite sure WHICH filled that roll.
After speaking with an online friend that’s part of a pagan discord community I’m currently spending time at, they spoke on their experiences with a video meditation another member of that community had put out that was designed to help a person find out who their spiritual guide for life actually is.
Keep in mind you can have spirit guides come and spirit guides leave over the course of your life, but the fylgia stays with you … from birth onward.
So, I decided to give this meditation a try last night.
Nordlys (the Pipe I carry) is kept on a shelf within my alter space that’s fashioned from an old antique “meat safe” that was in my parents’ home for decades.
I positioned myself in front of it with the upper cabinet doors open and the candles burning.
Had also burned a mixture of cedar, pine and lavender in preparation.
The Pipe rests with stone bowl separated from its stem, both on top of a section of coyote (the spirit animals that guard it actually) hide under with a full hide (also the Pipe bag for it when it goes out into the world) draped over both to keep Nordlys protected.
Now when I pray, often I’ll remove the coyote from on top and drape it over the left cabinet door, which I did in this case.
For this meditation, held my staff (made of iron) in both hands in front of me.
When I reached the world tree, the coyote was there with something that looked like stars in the fur of his face.
The stars circled around front of its ears and went down around the outside of the eyes and down along its muzzle to frame the face.
The owl was also present, nestled in the branches of the World Tree.
With their gaze on me, was led to reached out and take the pieces of the Pipe and join them together … something that only happens when the Pipe is going to be smoked.
Keep in mind that this is Spirit guiding.
Joined, held the Pipe with bowl in left hand and stem over left shoulder. Staff now held by my right hand.
Nordlys seemed to come alive … fluid in nature.
It lit with the glow of a star … and fire burned within.
The staff pulsed with energy and life as well.
Then I realized the Coyote had settled in on my left side …. realized this when I realized my fingers were moving through the fur of its upper back.
I can still feel the fur between my fingers and the muscles along its back and neck.
The owl …. fingers of my other hand ran across the soft feathers across back and wing.
If you’ve ever felt an owl feather … It’s unlike anything else as they are designed for silent controlled fast flight.
I could feel this beyond touch …. feel it in my spirit.
The Coyote padded along the path beside the hand holding the Pipe. Owl flew along the side holding the staff.
This as we walked to the base of Yggdrasil.
Now, we didn’t go anywhere but spent the moments exploring the curves and indentations of the World Tree’s trunk and branches. Becoming lost in its leaves.
That’s when the meditation started to call us back.
As the meditation ended, I didn’t even think … I was loading the Pipe using a prayer I’d recently written and smoked it in honor of the Coyote and Owl spirits that are always with me … The two halves of myself.
Both are my fylgia. Two halves of spirit with a blended path.
Owl represents the path of my own ancient ancestors while the Coyote is bound to me through the Nordlys (the Pipe) as I felt strongly that my journey right now in this place and time has been woven into the fabric of my Wyrd since long before I was born.
OHHH … Before I saw them originally at the beginning of the meditation when told us to reach out to our ancestors? … I head chanting like you might hear among Cherokee, Lakota or any of the first peoples of this land … Only I knew it was none of them.
This stretched out from a People so far back in time tribal names are lost to time itself. And I had the sense of they originated from somewhere in ancient Europe.
The Pipe billowed smoke more than I’ve ever seen, and as I was finishing … I saw and felt the Osprey.
Could see it flying through the forest in front of me … weaving in and out of the trees marking the path I was to follow … to keep me from getting lost.
Now THAT is something I can’t wrap my head around right now.
I am no more than anyone else walking the path, yet for some reason this Pipe bound me to it possibly even before I was born.
But then what is time to such Spirits?
An additional note I remembered later …
When I was exploring the trunk of Yggdrasil, I saw various faces … one wearing what looked like a large raven’s skull.
Another was at Mimir’s well. … An old man with a hardened face and such an intense gaze that I couldn’t break contact with his gaze.
It might have been Odin, but I’m not quite sure.
Although in that moment I did ponder the possibility it was Odin looking at me through his eye that he left in Mimir’s well.
So … The Owl and Coyote are both my fylgia reflecting both sides of my being.
The Osprey is guiding me (quite possibly of or from the Pipe itself) through the forest and along the path I need to follow.
*** Note — July 22, 2023 — It is interesting how one step on the path leads to another. We are never sure quite where it all leads in the end … only that one step leads to another.
If you consider the ends sometimes justify the means, what we see is often partial images … especially when one is learning and not but so seasoned on the path as I am (with something like this).
I need to perform the ceremony again as there are times I see the Goshawk (another hawk with a strip across the eye) in place of the Osprey with the Goshawk having appeared to me a few times in the waking world.
And then there is the Wolf. And I need to write a post on the dance of the Coyote and the Wolf in my life as well as the Kaiwolf … or Coywolf … or eastern Coyote as it is more well known as.